Cora K.

I've always known that something wasn't quite right with the way my brain functioned.  From a young age I had a deep uncontrollable sadness and looking back, I’ve realized that I was filled with depression, a type of depression that went deep into my heart. During my childhood I did have situations that were emotionally harmful. My parents divorced when I was in the second grade and have both remarried since then. Growing up we didn't have much money and making ends meet was tough, which was a stressor on me. The first instance I began to experience severe anxiety was on a field trip in elementary school, I remember standing in a room with other kids and then all of a sudden the room began to close on me and my vision went dim. My heart was racing and my breathing was different. I was having some sort of anxiety attack before I even knew what anxiety attacks were.

“I’ve realized that I was filled with depression, a type of depression that went deep into my heart.”

At eighteen years old, I was finally placed on antidepressants because my doctor felt that this was the right decision after years of me trying to battle depression on my own.  At the age of 22 I was diagnosed with both Bipolar Disorder 2. I had been experiencing a lot of symptoms of Bipolar Disorder for a couple of years which included racing thoughts, intense emotions, hopelessness, and suicidal ideation. My family eventually convinced me to go talk to my doctor because it seemed like more than just depression. I was also diagnosed during this time with a brain condition known as a Chiari Malformation. A Chiari Malformation is a brain condition where your brain doesn't fit properly into your head so part of your cerebellum herniates into the spinal cavity. Surgery is risky and painful, so currently I have chosen not to have a surgical procedure. I deal with symptoms on a daily basis - severe headaches, neck and back pain, coordination issues, unbalanced gait, rapid eye movement, fatigue, muscle weakness, vertigo etc. Unfortunately, I am also a survivor of sexual assault, which further compromised my mental health and physical health.

“There is an inexplicable sense of healing when someone says “I understand” and they truly do. You feel less alone.”

One of the things that has helped me through my experiences is meeting other people who have experienced similar things or have similar diagnoses to me. There is an inexplicable sense of healing when someone says "I understand" and they truly do. You feel less alone.

I also am really thankful for the support of my small group of friends and family who have been here for me through it all. They have accepted and loved me for who I am. They know me well so they can tell if I am falling into a depression. They also give me a sense of joy because I can help them in return for them helping me. It's nice to have people in your life with similar interests and people who know the real you.

My advice to others would be to please remember you are never alone. Reach out, even if you are afraid. Talk to a family member or friend. You can even see a professional, but please don't suffer in silence. It's so important we break the silence and work on ending the stigma on mental illness.

Some of my hobbies include a love of crystals and minerals. Expanding my knowledge about all things spiritual and healing has been a calming presence in my life. I've studied a lot about crystals and minerals and how they can be used to heal since I was a young teen. I also attended Reflexology (pressure point massaging) school and became certified six years ago. I love to read about the practice of mindfulness and other calming techniques to help me to feel better mentally, physically and spiritually! I am a double major in Psychology and Social Work at my university and learning more about the things I struggle with and what other people struggle with has also been eye opening and healing to me. Supporting others that have the same experiences as me or are going through difficult times has also helped me heal.

“ The amount of healing that can be obtained from listening to a song is incredible.”

I've also been really into music. The amount of healing that can be obtained from listening to a song is incredible. Although it may not seem like a happy and upbeat song, Florence + the Machine's "Various Storms & Saints" is my go to song for healing. The lyrics remind me so much of my feelings and experiences. It also serves as an amazing reminder that in the end you'll be okay as long as you hold on.