Isabella

The past four years have been pure hell. I faced a battle of depression, social anxiety, low self esteem, and self confidence brought on by the diagnosis of Premature Ovarian Failure. Premature Ovarian Failure is also known as Primary Ovarian Insufficiency which refers to a loss of normal function of your ovaries before age 40. If your ovaries fail, they don't produce normal amounts of the hormone estrogen or release eggs regularly. Infertility is a common result. In my case, this happened at age 14, though I was not diagnosed until I was 19. At just 19 I was told “You have no eggs...we don't know why or where it has come from, though, at this stage there isn't anymore tests we can do… sorry.’

I was broken. I was engulfed by the feeling of having my future ripped out from under my feet. 

Over the past four years I have been grieving the loss of my main priory & dream in life; to create a family of my own. These years have consisted of regular specialist and doctors appointments, thousands of dollars have been spent on procedures resulting in being picked, probed, jabbed, medicated, scanned, invasive procedures, but most of all I am grieving the loss of a biological child I have been told I will not conceive. 

When I thought I'd hit rock bottom, I was diagnosed with osteopenia. At 19 I was told "your bone mineral density is at the age of a 90 year old." Due to the lack of hormones through out my teenage years.

I also suffered with acne & struggled to gain weight. At the time I was studying my diploma of beauty therapy; I tried everything in my knowledge to "fix" my skin. I spent hundreds of dollars seeing naturopaths and dieticians trying to do it all the natural way until the point of depression & social anxiety had set in without seeing any results I gave in and went to a doctor. I was given medication to take daily. In return it has made me become super sensitive to the sun & the pigmentation on my face is beyond my years.

“What I have found helps is acceptance. I have also started training at the gym with a trainer which is helping me physically and mentally become stronger.”

What I have found helps is acceptance. I have also started training at the gym with a trainer which is helping me physically and mentally become stronger.

Confide in some you trust and make sure you have a strong support group. Find things that make you happy and do it;  whether it's cooking, walking, picking flowers, being creative, singing, dancing, swimming, reading books…

Take a deep breath and try focus on the present moment which is something I'm still trying to get the hang of.